Cloud

[residentflorist]

code

Lilium
Derived from Latin lilia, which may have come from a corrupted
pronunciation of a word from an extinct Eastern Mediterranean language
Humility, devotion, restored innocence after death

"Lovers used to give these when they were reunited."

Comments

[residentflorist]

[there's a flicker of guilt when he says "tifa was crying" because yes, she knows. she was in fact there.]

...Cid, Barret, Vincent and Cait were trying to fix the plane. Yuffie was laying in the grass by herself. And Tifa was with Red. You were...alone and a little ways away on the grass, waiting for them to be ready to go.

[residentmerc]

[ she was there and she remembers and he doesn't understand. not really. more than that; ]

... Why didn't you ever say anything?

[ he knows why, he thinks, but he hates it? he hates it. ]

[residentflorist]

[how do you tell your boyfriend you didn't say anything because his brain is absolute soup...]

...I didn't know how to, I guess. And then you mentioned that you saw Zack, and I don't even really know what happened anymore now. [because she. super remembers dying? but she also remembers...not...dying...so this has been a very wild eight weeks for aerith.]

[residentmerc]

[ he knows!!! he hates it!!!

speaking of soup, his feelings are a weird mix of guilt grief confusion static when she mentions zack woops ]

... Neither do I. But... [ could she see the sky? does she even remember telling him about the messed up sky first? he decides. to not talk about it some more. ] Maybe it doesn't matter right now. I... How do we make sure you come back?

[ whole and alive and on the right. plane. or whatever the FUCK. who cares what cloud sees or doesn't ]

[residentflorist]

[stop don't feel...well, okay, she gets it. zack being potentially around does just add a few more problems but it's...fine. it's fine, they'll figure it out later. right now there's another important problem.]

Scien said he could maybe help me, but...there's a lot of things that have changed, and I don't want to take his attention away from other things. So maybe...just going back to a little before? I don't know, really. [there's a pause, and then there's a shaky breath.] I want to come back.

[after eight weeks, she no longer wants to go back to the lifestream and leave them. and the idea of things somehow still not working is, frankly, terrifying. even if in the end she would accept her fate if it came down to it.]

[residentmerc]

[ well his guilt is mixed up feelings not all related to aerith he doesn't even entirely understand so it's fine he's not lingering on that thought there are More Important Current Things

part of it is wondering how many other people knew when she didn't want to tell him because he's #worthless but whatever not the point ]

Yeah. Me too. [ that's an important factor. ] ... Would going back to before work?

[ because sephiroth cheated the first time he knows he stopped that first strike the bitch ]

[residentflorist]

[stop it's not even that many, it's like. 5. but she's holding his hand tightly.]

I don't know. Depends on when, and depends on a couple of other things. [like sephiroth.] ...ideally, it'd be after. When he doesn't know I'm back. But I don't know if that'll change other things.

[the timeline is already broken.]

[residentmerc]

[ ONLY FIVE ]

Wasn't that the whole point of fighting the Whispers? To change things?

[ fuck the timeline if it means aerith is dead in it!!!!! ]

[residentflorist]

Yeah, but...you saw how the Whispers were, Cloud. There were still some things they were trying to intervene.

[like aerith withholding the black materia so cloud couldn't have it, for instance.]

[residentmerc]

I know. I'm saying, if things change... We'll deal with it.

[ together? being? the implication? maybe in this version of events he DOESNT deliver hte black materia (looks away) ]

[residentflorist]

...if they come back because I come back, we'll fight them off again. I don't know how I'm going to explain how I came back to begin with, but maybe that doesn't matter.

[honestly she's not even sure if they'd care anymore because they'd just be happy she was back, period.]

[residentmerc]

We've had weirder happen. [ have they. well. no but: ] They'll be glad you're back. That's what matters.

[residentflorist]

[she has slowed down their movement entirely, and she's looking at him for a moment before she's stepping closer and immediately latching onto him. is it clingy girlfriend hours? kind of. it's aerith being relieved he's actually taking this so well, and also aerith being scared of the future and gripping onto the future she wants.

she's fine, probably.]

[residentmerc]

[ holds her! he is used to clingy girlfriend hours by now, but. he is aware this is not regular clingy girlfriend hours. ]

... I'm sorry.

[ what else is there to say when you fail at stopping your girlfriend from getting murdered like seven times and also she can't talk to you about shit because you have one step out of reality at all times!!! ]

[residentflorist]

Pretty sure that's supposed to be my line to you. [mumbled into his chest mostly.] ...I should have told you earlier, but with everything happening here it never felt like a good time.

[also she never planned to, but that's fine.]

Didn't I say not to blame yourself?

[residentmerc]

[ unfortunately, it's everything week, so even if he deliberately does not say it, the because you knew I'd fail? comes through anyway. ]

It shouldn't have had to be on you to tell me something the others knew already.

[ yuffie tried, he thinks, maybe. she was saying something about aerith. maybe it doesn't matter. maybe if cloud hadn't been beaten over the head with it over and over again he would've never been able to... see it. he doesn't even know. ]

[residentflorist]

[she just frowns to that.]

Hey. [hey? no?] That's not true.

[she's going to ignore the other half because cloud is thinking a thing that she does not want him lingering on.]

[residentmerc]

Isn't it?

[ HE DOES NOT KNOW HIS THOUGHTS ARE LEAKING ]

[residentflorist]

It has nothing to do with if you would fail, Cloud.

[outright addressing it AHHHH.]

[residentmerc]

[ well. he hates thoughtshare. but. ]

Then why?

[residentflorist]

I told you not to blame yourself for the same reason I wondered if you would come and save me before the first time. Because you take on the responsibility yourself, even for the things that were never your fault to begin with.

[residentmerc]

I was there and I couldn't save you.

[ he tried and maybe sephiroth cheated but ALSO ]

[residentflorist]

Cloud...[this is why she didn't want to tell him!] I don't understand how, but Sephiroth...

[hm. how do you say "sephiroth is fucking around, and also i think we broke our timeline, and i think i'm between both"? maybe just blaming sephiroth is good enough.]

[residentmerc]

[ this is not why she didn't want to tell him, but she says sephiroth's name and cloud just sighs because. yeah. yeah he fucking knows. ]

... It doesn't matter. He's not getting another shot.

[ a. fourth? shot? i dont know how to count the many times shes died here. ]

[residentflorist]

[listen. she can have multiple reasons not to tell him, they are all technically sephiroth's fault. but there's a slow nod as she continues holding onto him and trying to pour a bunch of affection into him.]

...are you mad? [that she didn't tell him sooner.]