Cloud

[residentflorist]

code

Lilium
Derived from Latin lilia, which may have come from a corrupted
pronunciation of a word from an extinct Eastern Mediterranean language
Humility, devotion, restored innocence after death

"Lovers used to give these when they were reunited."

Comments

[residentmerc]

[ IF THEY DON'T KISS THIS WEEK I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF

he is thinking about zack and about tifa because he is a little poly bitch. except not really right this second. because she says that and he just tilts his head to look at her ]

Wouldn't change my answer.

[residentflorist]

[WE ARE ALREADY DEAD.

to be fair she's thinking more about tifa than she would be about zack because up until about a week or so ago she really did think zack was gone and she herself would soon be gone, too. cloud needed tifa. and tifa needed cloud. that was always the plan, in a way, back when she sort of knew what she was doing.

granted she'd been...kinda too stupid to think about her own feelings and now is in the middle of "oh. well. this happened." and finds herself thinking that while cloud and tifa should in fact still be together...she's not going to deny it? obviously she cares about him and wants him for herself. so...even with that in mind, she is pushing the other two hands of the poly aside for a moment.]

Then that's my answer.

[residentmerc]

Then like I said. As long as you want.

[ even if it is a really long time. even with everything he's never entirely sure how she feels, because what feels like a million years ago she told him not to fall in love with her, and that if he had it wouldn't be real. and then, in that dream...

liking and "liking", right?

so he doesn't know even with everything else they've done. he wants to be there for her, though. be there with her. that part's real. maybe that's what matters. ]

[residentflorist]

[yeah, that's aerith's own behavior (and her dream self's behavior???) biting her in the ass a little. you can't always control how you feel, despite the warnings and doing your best to try and help someone avoid a heartache.

boothill had asked her what they were to each other, and when she'd said they were just friends she'd thought that maybe that wasn't quite right anymore. they're not dating either, that's not right either. it's some weird in-between she hasn't quite figured out just yet, nor has she figured out how to broach the topic. instead, she keeps herself planted firmly in his side and she ponders quietly, thinking of which of the many thousands of topics bouncing around in her head she wants to try to address.]

Thank you, Cloud. [she starts with that, because sometimes she's still not entirely sure he knows how much he's done for her and what he means in general.] ...hey. Do you think...I mean, we have to find a way back. We can't leave Yuffie alone, and we need to get home. We need to get everyone out of here and come back. But...do you think it's wrong to sometimes...not focus on only that?

[residentmerc]

[ it's fine, they can both not know how to address anything. including what they may or may not be to each other. he mulls over her question for a bit. ]

Well... [ he doesn't actually think the answer is that hard. it's just that it feels messed up to admit. ] No. It's not. It's like... taking a break at Costa del Sol or the Gold Saucer, right? We had a goal, but you guys still wanted to take that time. [ he wasn't against it, necessarily, but it wasn't his scene at all, either time. so he let red vote against barret instead. ] It's not wrong to... take a break now and then. Probably.

[ he says probably because--well. it does make him feel guilty. and he's always got that itch, that drive to go back, to seek--it's easier to ignore here, but it's there. ]

[residentflorist]

[those are the exact same examples she thought of when she was talking to famine about this, and it sort of makes her smile a little that cloud's on the same wavelength.]

You guys enjoyed it too after a while. [he's not saying they didn't, but she's commenting on it anyway.] But I guess I've been thinking about that. We know what our goal is, but...maybe that's another thing I want with you, too. Breaks. Things we can do to spend some time together while we're here.

[something less miserable. something to let her connect with him more while she can.]

[residentmerc]

[ he's not against that. really. he's not against that at all, just like he doesn't deny he kind of enjoyed the breaks they took. he just shrugs. ]

Mmm. Well... Can't say firefighting together is cutting it on that front. We might have to figure something better. [ it's a vague attempt to lighten the mood a little while agreeing he'd also like that. but. a little more honest; ] We looked around, but I wasn't really thinking about stuff like that.

[ breaks and doing things on said breaks. so he is useless on that front right now, which is, as we all know, Unsurprising ]

[residentflorist]

Nope. Not exactly my idea of a fun date either. [she'll take the chance to make things a little lighter.] We were a little more focused on seeing what was around, right? But maybe...I don't know. We have the beach now permanently. And there're some shops here that we didn't have on that side. It doesn't have to be anything fancy. Maybe even just a picnic at the lake?

[simple. just being together.]

[residentmerc]

... I don't think I've ever had a picnic. [ it's pensive. it's not like he's never eaten outdoors (Far From It, obviously), but a picnic feels different anyway. not in a bad way. ] So... looking through the shops and having a picnic by the lake after. Is that something?

[ by god is he trying on this alpha week ]

[residentflorist]

[it's very domestic, and she seems to realize that because she pauses to think about it for a moment. but cloud's not saying no.]

I think it's something. Don't you? It's just for the two of us. [cloud is. trying. will she make this easier? no. but they're getting there.]

[residentmerc]

[ it is incredibly domestic and he's trying not to consider it too much. it's alpha week!!! he is SO alpha ]

I know. It's... It's not something I'd want to do with anyone else here.

[residentflorist]

[THIS ENTIRE CONVERSATION IS SO DOMESTIC BUT HERE THEY ARE.]

Just here, huh? [unfortunately she does have to tease him a little, and...maybe there is a little part of her that wonders about other people, too.]

[residentmerc]

That's... [ hrm. ] Here's where we're having the picnic in the first place.

[ he can't pretend he also wouldn't want to do this with tifa, but then if he thinks that he wonders if that makes him an asshole. he thinks aerith would also enjoy a picnic with tifa, though. does that count. ]

[residentflorist]

[...well yeah he's not wrong, she would enjoy that but that's a whole other topic here.]

I guess that's true. Buuuut your options are pretty slim here anyway, aren't they? [tell her you want to spend time with just her in general, omega.]

[residentmerc]

They're not that slim. [ wow!!! by here he meant the whole game not just the gy!!!! ] It's not like I wouldn't do this with you back home, too.

[residentflorist]

It was just a lot harder to back home. Even getting you to myself for just a few hours felt like a victory sometimes.

[residentmerc]

[ he blinks at that like. she was trying to? because he's an idiot ]

Well... There's a lot of us. And we've got a lot to do.

[residentflorist]

[cloud...she's not going to explain but my god.]

We do. And all of us know that and are doing our best to make things right. Even if it means setting aside some of the other things we want sometimes.

[residentmerc]

... Right. [ mmm. ] It's not like you didn't go off with the others too a few times.

[ maybe most of the time when they had a couple of hours to themselves it is because aerith sought him out or asked for it, but he never said no either? so he doesn't see how it was a victory. ]

I wasn't trying to dodge you.

[residentflorist]

Yeah, I know. [and she does. there were plenty of times she went off with tifa or red on her own and left cloud to his own devices.] If you were really trying to dodge you'd be very bad at it. But sometimes it felt like...you were surprised, I guess.

[residentmerc]

It's not... [ surprise, except maybe sometimes it is. Hmmmm. ] ... I guess... sometimes I'm not sure what you really want.

[ from him, in general. how much of it is teasing. that sort of stuff. ]

[residentflorist]

[that is by design and she knows that, but now that they've been removed from their dire circumstances, she's thinking a little more about actually going for what she wants right now.]

You've also never asked, really.

[residentmerc]

[ well, he has, but it was in a scenario he isn't entirely sure was with the aerith in front of him, or one she remembers, and that gets confusing, so; ]

Would you have answered if I did?

[residentflorist]

Maybe. [she will be honest in this moment because she knows herself, and she knows that means she isn't always upfront about things, or wants to tell people the full truth.] Probably. But...we've all been busy.

[residentmerc]

... We're not busy right now. [ right now, because they are a little busy in this hellhole sometimes. ] So... what do you want?