Digitalis Old English folklore said that foxes wore the flowers on their paws to silence movement and stealthily stalk prey. Healing, pain, insincerity, insecurity
[she waves her hands like "yeah i'm tired of curses" while unaware the next day is going to be equally messy.]
I was! I was thinking about it a little more...with all of the animals around, maybe we should stick to something like the candied fruits? they're less likely to be taken by birds or rats, or even go bad when we leave them out there. But since it's just the fruit we could also pick some flowers out for them.
Yeah. The kids did a good job with preparations but everything eventually starts to break down. [candied fruit can't stay that way forever.] Maybe...lilies would be a nice touch. There's a patch of yellow ones that just bloomed, it looks like.
I've learned a little, but not too much. Some of them are easier than others to understand the means behind them, like roses. But lilies are a little different. Some of them can mean reunion, while others can mean being able to move on.
...the flowers that grow around the church are special. [she means back home, to explain why she knows some things.] They say they're ones lovers would exchange when brought back together. But I think in this case we can leave them as a sign for hoping to meet again someday.
[someday she'll give him the full reason why that is, but for now this is enough. for now, she smiles a little because she's happy he picked up on what she was actually getting at.]
Something we all have to remind ourselves, don't you think? Even if we may not know each other for very long, I think people can love other people easily if they connect. And that love doesn't go away just because you're not together anymore. [so why shouldn't they do these kinds of things?]
[ He absently rubs at his own shoulder, listening. ]
...Yeah. In all sorts of ways... good and bad.
[ He's going to go over and pick up a plate of candied fruits, gently maneuvering a few into place so they sit in a neater pattern. May as well make it look nice. ]
I think Mr. Gojo arranged to have the memorials be a bit more gathered together in one place?
Yeah. [softly. you can love someone a lot, but that doesn't guarantee you'll get to keep them. she's far too aware of it, and yet here she is, still trying to love people. she's following behind him and watching over his shoulder, letting him do the plating.]
Oh, yeah. His approach isn't always the greatest but he wants to try making things a little better. I said he should ask where they should all go. I'm glad he was thinking about it. [gojo's a funny little guy but she likes him.]
He has a hard time connecting in a way that's really conducive to caring about people's problems or fully understanding their feelings. But...he's trying. He said he's trying to be a better person, and I believe that. [somehow she and gojo have had a few conversations about this.]
But I think so, too. He's smart. Good at observing things. I think people like that are just as important as the people willing to reach out to other people. We need both kinds, don't we?
[ Losing it she really just read his ass in front of Daan. ]
...
Very concise breakdown, Ms. Gainsborough. But I think I more or less agree. He's a little blunt, but we need someone who won't talk around the harder things sometimes.
I mean... I could be that person, but I'm no good at it.
Right! [she says, somehow not caring she really just exposed him like this because daan has a point. they need someone who'll be blunt when they need it...even if that someone is a slightly too blunt eighteen year old. but there's a moment's pause and she tilts her head, adding another bit of fruit to the plate.]
...Daan, what would you say that you think you're good at? [spoilers, gojo said almost this exact thing to her and she asked him the same question. why are you both this way.]
Be honest... do I look like the type? I'm really not. I don't think even if I had served in the infantry, I'd still answer that I was good at combat.
[ Like... he wouldn't say he CAN'T fight at all, but he is not delusional enough to be like oh yeah! I'm heckin' great at that. I say, while he is one of the more annoying/dangerous characters to fight and somehow has the highest accuracy skill in the game in a way. ]
Oh, no, I don't think you're the type to fight. [she's just out here going "yeah no i wouldn't count you as a fighter." also love that for him.] But I meant when I was talking to Gojo about trying to keep people on track and talk to them, and he said he wasn't really good at it. I asked what he thought he was good at and he said combat. Your answer is making drinks. And I think both of those things are skills that require observing people to know what best to serve them.
So. You might not feel like you're not good at not talking around the hard things, but I do think you're probably better about some pieces of it than you think.
[ Thank you. Others have agreed. He's maybe internally a little like hey that she just countered with the agreement so fast even though he said it first. ]
Oh, don't understand me, Ms. Gainsborough... if I had to, I will. I'm under no actual obligation to help anybody like a real doctor should, let alone be nice about it. Never actually took that Oath...
Still... dealing with people is hard? I guess that's what it is, in the end.
For good things or bad things... never really been good with people.
[this is going to be a little harder for her to believe come thursday, but it's okay. for argument's sake, she lets him say his piece and she nods along. she knows better than to underestimate what people will do, but...she's also stubborn when it comes to her impressions of people. it might make her a little annoying to some, but it's just how she's been. trying to see the best in people, and trying to prove there's something else there.]
...would you believe me if I said I'm still learning how to really talk to people? [that aside:] Nobody's going to force you to be better than you feel you can be, but I think you've done pretty okay with me so far.
[ He is just as contradictory in the game so this tracks. He really has a conversational spiel with another character about this and every player who has seen him hanging around the Old Town the entire first day just helping sick people is like okay jackass. ]
I'd be surprised if you did. You sound like someone you'd have a natural morning pleasant conversation with while I get a daily flower and a coffee.
[yeah this tracks, i'm gonna hang this man upside down and shake him. it's okay, aerith is simply going to just ignore him being contradictory because she's had enough of this bullshit from cloud, too. you learn to pick and choose what you want to believe.
for the rest, she smiles a little before looking at the plate. that should be enough for now, she thinks, so she gestures for him to follow so they can pick some flowers.]
It's true. [she's aware how she comes off. she's fully aware she comes off as bubbly and friendly and overly chatty by nature because...well, she is. but that doesn't mean much when you don't get a lot of chances to engage with the outside world, and when you know you're extremely different from everyone around you and it leaves you alone so often. she doesn't continue immediately as they walk, as if she's formulating how to say this.] ...I didn't really have the same experiences as other people when I was little. I didn't get to make friends or talk to many other people until I was older. There were people I knew around the sector, but nobody I really could consider someone I was close to. So maybe I'm trying to make up for all of that now. But even now...sometimes I say the wrong thing, or I ask questions that're selfish ones because I didn't think of how it'd make someone else feel. I don't always think about how the things I want could be something that could hurt somebody else.
[ Where Aerith is talented in filling the space with conversation, Daan is the opposite -- silence swallows him like a mist, but according to others, it's not all so bad. Allegedly. He follows as a quiet presence, letting her mull over her words before she continues any further. ]
...
Not sure if it'd make you feel better about it, but I was kind of the same. The social part, I mean.
[ Not so much the conversation part, but again, he's more of the silent type anyway. ]
But you know... it's only human to make mistakes. Especially when it comes to conversation.
[silence isn't bad. or maybe she's used to this. at least this is almost a comforting sort of silence that comes from knowing someone's still nearby rather than the deafening silence of knowing you're alone and ignored.
but she tilts her head a bit to the first part, because she's kind of like "yes this makes sense" while also going "okay this man did somehow get married though" but she does have enough sense not to point that part out. it's a little more to fill in the puzzle of who daan is.]
Maybe I just don't want to make mistakes with people who matter. [a little bit of honesty, because aerith tends to put more pressure on herself than anything. her idea of being selfish really is like visiting the parents of a boy she used to love and introducing herself and learning more about his upbringing when nobody's heard from said-boy for five years. she'd thought of herself as selfish for wanting to satisfy that curiosity, for not thinking about how it would make his parents feel. and here, she sometimes wonders if she's going to push some of these people too far by being as curious as she is and being as stubborn as she can be sometimes. these are all fun things for later. all in all, she doesn't disagree.]
But it is hard sometimes. I can't say it isn't. I don't want to be the person who sends a person backwards just because of something I've said. But I don't want to stop trying to reach people either.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
I was! I was thinking about it a little more...with all of the animals around, maybe we should stick to something like the candied fruits? they're less likely to be taken by birds or rats, or even go bad when we leave them out there. But since it's just the fruit we could also pick some flowers out for them.
no subject
[ Their rats. ]
Even still, guess we should clear it out after a day or two just in case, but -- for starters, that sounds good. Flowers are a nice touch.
no subject
no subject
That sounds nice.
I hear there's a language to flowers, though I don't know much about them.
no subject
no subject
[ How interesting. ]
Yellow lilies it is...
no subject
...the flowers that grow around the church are special. [she means back home, to explain why she knows some things.] They say they're ones lovers would exchange when brought back together. But I think in this case we can leave them as a sign for hoping to meet again someday.
no subject
[ Just that they were special. He's quiet a bit when she explains, letting that hang in the air. ]
...Yeah. I think that works well enough.
Love comes in all kinds of forms.
no subject
Something we all have to remind ourselves, don't you think? Even if we may not know each other for very long, I think people can love other people easily if they connect. And that love doesn't go away just because you're not together anymore. [so why shouldn't they do these kinds of things?]
no subject
...Yeah. In all sorts of ways... good and bad.
[ He's going to go over and pick up a plate of candied fruits, gently maneuvering a few into place so they sit in a neater pattern. May as well make it look nice. ]
I think Mr. Gojo arranged to have the memorials be a bit more gathered together in one place?
no subject
Oh, yeah. His approach isn't always the greatest but he wants to try making things a little better. I said he should ask where they should all go. I'm glad he was thinking about it. [gojo's a funny little guy but she likes him.]
no subject
[ Gojo really. Is just so much. Like as a person. Actual clown. ]
Intuitive, though. I think he has similar concerns as us.
no subject
But I think so, too. He's smart. Good at observing things. I think people like that are just as important as the people willing to reach out to other people. We need both kinds, don't we?
no subject
...
Very concise breakdown, Ms. Gainsborough. But I think I more or less agree. He's a little blunt, but we need someone who won't talk around the harder things sometimes.
I mean... I could be that person, but I'm no good at it.
no subject
Right! [she says, somehow not caring she really just exposed him like this because daan has a point. they need someone who'll be blunt when they need it...even if that someone is a slightly too blunt eighteen year old. but there's a moment's pause and she tilts her head, adding another bit of fruit to the plate.]
...Daan, what would you say that you think you're good at? [spoilers, gojo said almost this exact thing to her and she asked him the same question. why are you both this way.]
no subject
...
I think I can make a pretty mean drink.
Why?
no subject
His answer was combat. [and she shakes her head.] I think you're probably better at more than just that even if you don't feel like you are.
no subject
[ Like... he wouldn't say he CAN'T fight at all, but he is not delusional enough to be like oh yeah! I'm heckin' great at that. I say, while he is one of the more annoying/dangerous characters to fight and somehow has the highest accuracy skill in the game in a way. ]
no subject
So. You might not feel like you're not good at not talking around the hard things, but I do think you're probably better about some pieces of it than you think.
no subject
Oh, don't understand me, Ms. Gainsborough... if I had to, I will. I'm under no actual obligation to help anybody like a real doctor should, let alone be nice about it. Never actually took that Oath...
Still... dealing with people is hard? I guess that's what it is, in the end.
For good things or bad things... never really been good with people.
no subject
...would you believe me if I said I'm still learning how to really talk to people? [that aside:] Nobody's going to force you to be better than you feel you can be, but I think you've done pretty okay with me so far.
no subject
I'd be surprised if you did. You sound like someone you'd have a natural morning pleasant conversation with while I get a daily flower and a coffee.
no subject
for the rest, she smiles a little before looking at the plate. that should be enough for now, she thinks, so she gestures for him to follow so they can pick some flowers.]
It's true. [she's aware how she comes off. she's fully aware she comes off as bubbly and friendly and overly chatty by nature because...well, she is. but that doesn't mean much when you don't get a lot of chances to engage with the outside world, and when you know you're extremely different from everyone around you and it leaves you alone so often. she doesn't continue immediately as they walk, as if she's formulating how to say this.] ...I didn't really have the same experiences as other people when I was little. I didn't get to make friends or talk to many other people until I was older. There were people I knew around the sector, but nobody I really could consider someone I was close to. So maybe I'm trying to make up for all of that now. But even now...sometimes I say the wrong thing, or I ask questions that're selfish ones because I didn't think of how it'd make someone else feel. I don't always think about how the things I want could be something that could hurt somebody else.
no subject
...
Not sure if it'd make you feel better about it, but I was kind of the same. The social part, I mean.
[ Not so much the conversation part, but again, he's more of the silent type anyway. ]
But you know... it's only human to make mistakes. Especially when it comes to conversation.
That stuff's harder than anyone wants to admit.
no subject
but she tilts her head a bit to the first part, because she's kind of like "yes this makes sense" while also going "okay this man did somehow get married though" but she does have enough sense not to point that part out. it's a little more to fill in the puzzle of who daan is.]
Maybe I just don't want to make mistakes with people who matter. [a little bit of honesty, because aerith tends to put more pressure on herself than anything. her idea of being selfish really is like visiting the parents of a boy she used to love and introducing herself and learning more about his upbringing when nobody's heard from said-boy for five years. she'd thought of herself as selfish for wanting to satisfy that curiosity, for not thinking about how it would make his parents feel. and here, she sometimes wonders if she's going to push some of these people too far by being as curious as she is and being as stubborn as she can be sometimes. these are all fun things for later. all in all, she doesn't disagree.]
But it is hard sometimes. I can't say it isn't. I don't want to be the person who sends a person backwards just because of something I've said. But I don't want to stop trying to reach people either.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)