Daan

[residentflorist]

code

Digitalis
Old English folklore said that foxes wore the flowers on their paws
to silence movement and stealthily stalk prey.
Healing, pain, insincerity, insecurity

Comments

[recession]

[ Oh nevermind we're the same after all. ]

I can see where he's coming from. Not that I intend to add onto your disappointment.

[ But grief is ever-lasting...... ]

[residentflorist]

[yeah you are she just traded one depressed man for another and now has both.]

I wouldn't call it disappointing when you've been upfront about it since the beginning. But just like with Nehan, I think maybe someday, if you wanted, there may be something left for you.

[recession]

...It just won't be with my old life, that's all.

It's trying to carve out something new that's probably the hardest, when everything's so different now.

[residentflorist]

...even harder when you were happy in your old life. It's natural to compare the old life with anything new, and considering how recent your circumstances are...it doesn't really feel so much like an old life either. More like a life you had, and now you're in between. And even the things that still exist and used to make you happy might not cut it anymore.

An ending, really. But no good mark for a new beginning.

[recession]

...

[ He has nothing to disagree with, with anything Aerith's just said. Yeah. ]

It only helps that I don't think just... rebuilding is going to be an option. At the bare minimum, not easy.

[residentflorist]

You can't just rebuild over what you've lost and call it good. All of those memories that led you to where you are will still be there. [...] But I do think with enough of the right materials someday, you could have a foundation again. Little by little. Even if you don't know what those things look like, being open to them coming to you counts for something.

[recession]

[ The emotion here isn't quite doubt, but just a raw uncertainty. Maybe that day will come, sure, but he's not sure if it'll be a good thing. ]

Maybe.

[residentflorist]

...does it feel like abandoning everything that once made you happy to try and think of a maybe someday?

[she gets that with his special brand of depression he's just deeply sad and having a hard time finding a will to look for something good in general. but she's curious if that's also it, given his wife and what they were building together.]

[recession]

That would've probably been it if it was a few weeks ago.

[ It would've been too fresh, too early to move on. Weirdly enough his CYOA helped push closure on him though. ]

Now...

[ There's a well of uncertainty, followed by a sense of wretchedness and level of fear. ]

It's just a lot of things to consider from here on.

[residentflorist]

[zia really did say that your cyoa was probably good for daan and i'm so scared why that is. but...well.]

Being here is another unexpected chain of events, I'm sure. Before you can even consider any of that, it's considering how to get out of here and press forward. [...] I don't know if it'll ever help you, but you know you can always just...talk out loud about things if you need someone to listen. Trying to put the pieces together in your own head can be messy sometimes.

[recession]

Thanks for the advice and offer.

I'll keep it in mind.

[ He says, and then rarely ever proceeds to talk about it but that's fine. ]

[residentflorist]

That's all I ask.

[it's okay she'll bully the hell out of him (gently) in the future, but lowe we can also let this one go since we have three others and also prep for new week.]